The hardest struggle in my life was when I was around the age of 8. When I was 8 years old, my father was in jail. And we were put out of where we lived. I blame my father to this day for doing what he did because he abandoned me and my family. He sold drugs so we always had the money to pay the bills but when he got arrested we had nothing. At the age of 8, I can say my family was staying everywhere. We always tried to stay with people but things never really worked out. We never would get along with the people. We thought a car was home. There was nice soft seats and there was a car roof over our head. We ate 50 cent rice out of this Chinese place in Gary, Indiana but that all stopped when the worst thing happened. Our mom got on drugs. 

    I never will hate my mom for being on drugs because I'm sure things were really hard for her since my dead beat father was in prison. We still lived in a car at this time and we rarely saw our mother and when we did see her she was only there for like a few minutes. It felt like a hug somebody gives you when you're sad. My sister, brother and me got hungry after awhile so we started going places and begging for food and we always felt left out because when we would go to places the people there would  stare at us as if we were nothing. We was nothing. Trying to survive at the age we were was very hard because we weren't street smart at all. We were very confused about almost everything. My sister got in a fight with some girl at a store who kept telling people that me and my brother stink. Even though it was true I guess my sister didn't like her saying stuff. 

    We saw our mom again and I remember it was a late night and she was high of course. I really started losing respect for her because she wasn't raising me so she didn't deserve respect. My mom said, "Kids, look. One day this will all be over. This will all be done and we will be living like normal people, normal people!" I said, "Yea right." We was one pipe, one mom and one dad away from being normal people and since I no none of that stuff would come or go away, we were stuck living like aliens to the world. My mom's eyes never sparkled like they used to. Her smile was never bright like it used to be, and her touch wasn't as powerful. I lost my mom. My sister, brother and me always caught it hard. It was never easy for us. 

    Before my dad went to jail he kept me in Church. I was always there. I stopped believing in god when I was little because I always thought why would he want to see his kids suffer like this and not be nothing? I disliked  everything: my mom and dad and god. I loved my sister and brother. They meant everything to me. I Knew in my head that getting on your knees and praying to some mysterious god was just a joke. I remember in the bible when it was stated, "Let there be light," and there was light. Why couldn't he snap his fingers and help us? I later found out in life that god don't never bring you down to stay that way. There is always a lesson to learn. Even if it was not for us. 

    The struggle that my parents put my sister, brother and I through was all their fault for being stupid and for not using their right mind. I guess god got tired of us living the way we were. I remember my mom coming in telling us to come with her and that she was clean and that she had met a man named Larry, (our stepdad). And that we were going to live with him. I was so happy so was my sis and brother. We had our mom back. It was like new life for us but little did we know it was like a new hell.